Is this the Ohio Grassman?

In the spirit our enduring lightheartedness here, ( I am weary of Egypt, Syria, Palestine, etc.) I offer you the spectacle of a hunt by "professional" hunters and trappers from West Virginia (something like Auvergne in France) for the supposed large bipedal primate known variously in the US and Canada as Sasquatch.  In Ohio it is the "Grassman."

This stalwart crew pursued the beast in Perry County in eastern Ohio, a place much like their own.  Their chatter abut traps, lines of least resistance, the need for running water, etc.  rings true to an old hunter.

Their adventure is recorded on the "Destination America" channel on a program called "Mountain Monsters."

Basilisk and I have decided to volunteer to join the group.  We would fit right in.  TTG and Alan Farrell could as well but would have to "fill out" some.  pl

Comments

[John Minnerath]

I'll go! Probably have to fill a REMF slot.
I used to make a pretty good pot of camp coffee.
And I was a hell of a mule packer a few decades ago.

[J]

A wonderful lady from an old farming family here in Oklahoma told me first hand that they (her family) had a 'community' of what ever they were living in a quarry area on their large farm. The older lady who told me this is known for her truthfulness, said that when she was a little girl she used to go up to the quarry area and play with their little ones. She said that their adults were always gentle and kind to her and encouraged the playing between her and their little ones. Her father told her over and over again to stay away from that area and to 'leave them alone', needless to say she told me that she did not listen to her father and continued to play with them on into her late teens.

[DickT]

I highly recommend the norwegian movie "Trollhunter" for tips on gear and technique for this sort of thing.

[The Twisted Genius]

Just checked out some "Mountain Monsters" videos. These guys are awesome! Almost makes me want to spring for cable. I'd enjoy hanging out with these guys in the cold wet woods of WV hunting for god knows what and having the crap scared out of me. Plus, I like the way they dress. Another plus is that if something hungry is chasing us, I am damned sure I can outrun Buck.

[turcopolier]

Dick T

Trollhunter is one of my favorites. We could feed "Buck" to a troll as bait but the trap builder in MM would have to build something grand. pl

[The Twisted Genius]

John Minnerath, with your photography skills, we need you out front to capture the proof.

[r whitman]

PL , I know you will not shoot him since you gave up blood sports. If you catch him, make him Secretary of State.

[John Minnerath]

Out front!?!
I gave that up as a bad habit, how about I ride in one of those cool monster trucks?

[Basilisk]

I watched this episode of Mountain Monsters after Pat pointed it our to me. My first thought is the cast, minus fifty or sixty years and a couple hundred pounds could easily stand in for the Army of Northern Virginia at the end. It is remarkable that the mountain barriers of the Appalachians can apparently contain very alien cultures (at least compared to the effete lands of say, the Hamptons, or the LA Basin). You think the "Grassman" is alien? merely look at those who are hunting him (it?).

I think the production values of this series are reasonably high. There are low-light shots and handheld work that is right up there with the "Blair Witch Project."

As to the "creature," I cannot say. According to the show there have been reports of such things ever since white men came west of the Blue Ridge in the 18th Century. I watched another one of these "reality shows" called "Monster Quest" on the History Channel, and unless there is collusion between the producers, there seems to be remarkable correspondence in the reported characteristics of the creatures, whether they are called Grassman, Sasquatch, Bigfoot, or whatever. The History Channel maintains that the creatures live on deer, the Discovery Channel is mute on this subject.

The hunters of "Mountain Monsters" maintain that "they could turn and kill us all," but as far as I see, there is no history of violence toward humans. It is hard to believe that a species couid go largely undetected in the world of ubiquitous cellphone cameras, but the foothills of the Appalachians are not Rodeo Drive, so who knows?

The Colonel wants to join the crew, and I cannot resist, but after watching their muzzle discipline and the omnipresent finger-on-trigger thing, I think I will bring my sniper rifle, I will be in overwatch, just in case Armageddon comes. The "Grassman is supposed to be seven or eight feet in height and weigh 7 or 800 lbs. I am pretty sure I can hit that target every time from a thousand yards, and that is as close as I want to be to that bunch of mountain men stumbling around with shotguns and high-powered rifles.

I have resisted reality TV with all my willpower, but you've got to take a look at ths series. It's way better than C-Span these days.

After all, wouldn't it be cool if the creatures actually exist?

[Fred]

Secretary of State? Heck no, the Lions could us a good left tackle.

[turcopolier]

basilisk

they are a bit loose with gun muzzles. bless them. pl

[John Minnerath]

If I'm going to be a get the proof cameraman for this goat roping I'm going to bring my 460 S&W Magnum as back up. You gotta have some back up.

[The Twisted Genius]

PL, I share your sentiment. You haven't lived until you've stood among a group of wild eyed militiamen firing off celebratory gunfire. Makes you wish you at least wore a helmet.

[turcopolier]

JM
I have a .357 I would take for close in defense. pl

[The Twisted Genius]

I got a kick out of that guy carrying nothing but a stout stick ready to whoop up on the eight foot tall grassman. Thinking things through is clearly overrated.

[Maureen Lang]

I'd venture to say you could use an experienced cryptozoologist with you, gentlemen. The site link below might help find one to your liking (lot of Squatch aficionados posting there):

http://www.cryptomundo.com/cryptozoo-news/cz-career/

[optimax]

I'm pretty sure Grassman is an old dorm-mate of mine from Ohio University from my sophomore year, 1970. He had long curly dark hair and an extremely hairy body. After his girlfriend broke up with him, he never showered and laid in bed all day stoned on weed, listening over-and-over to the Stones "Let It Bleed" album. We called him Grassman and he never even left his room to eat at the cafeteria but ordered Dominoes Pizza everyday, the empty boxes piling up on the floor until the delivery man could only open the door wide enough to slide the box through sideways.

We had to call the fire department to break down his door when we realized he hadn't order pizza for over a week. A month later he was sited living in a cave above the Hocking River. A couple of us went in search of Grassman and found his cave. He wasn't there but there were a few pizza boxes and he must have depleted his finances because there was a skinned squirrel roasting on a spit over hot embers. We heard dry leaves crunching behind us but when we turned we couldn't tell if it was a deer or a hairy, naked wild man running from us through the woods. We were pretty sure it was Grassman.
I guess he never did get over what's her name.

[turcopolier]

optimax

Try to remember her name. Maybe we could lure him in with that. pl

[Duncan Kinder]

While in Perry County, be sure to visit Nelsonville, in nearby Athens County. It has a special art event:

On the final Friday of every month (excluding December), galleries and retail shops on Nelsonville's Historic Square stay open late to feature special art events.

http://www.athensohio.com/whattodo/final-fridays-on-the-square

"From 6:00 pm - 10:00 pm, enjoy artists' demonstrations, art chats, artists at work in their studios and openings of new art exhibits, plays, and musical shows. Watch drum circles, street musicians, dancers, and other sidewalk entertainment amidst artists & craftspersons selling their wares."

Birthplace of Sarah Jessica Parker, of Sex and the City Fame, there are creatures to stalk in Nelsonville, though perhaps not as rowdy as Grassman.

I discussed you post with my mother and sister, neither of whom knew of him. But then the conversation turned to coyotes and black bears, both of which can be found.

[optimax]

Col

Her name was Ruby Tuesday. Be careful about using her name as bait; it might send him into a homicidal rage.

DK

I've passed through Nelsonville many times on my way to OU. It has changed a lot since then. Lancaster had a restaurant owned by Lou "The Toe" Grozza.

[Larry Mitchell]

Perry County Ohio is the home of New Straitsville where they hold the annual Moonshine Festival. Positioning your forward operating base near a supply of moonshine will greatly increase your probability of seeing ole sasquatch (and probably a lot more). I agree that Nelsonville is fun on the right nights, and be sure to look at Stuart's Opera House. If you get to Athens to party with the college students, take the hunting party to dinner at Casa Nueva and/or Purple Chopstix.

I never thought an old hillbilly would be qualified to comment on this blog, but I'd forgotten the importance of sasquatch.

[Babak Makkinejad]

All:

There is not enough edible plants or small or large animals in this area to support any sizable community of such large mamamls.

[John Minnerath]

A 357 is a little light for 8 foot tall critters, maybe a 44 Mag as minimum.
Speaking of which, in Safeway the other day I walked by my old friend who's been on a long quest for Bigfoot in the swamps of East Texas, but when I turned around he had vanished into the undergrowth of the herbal tea and organically grown Dorito aisle.
Here in these mountains we don't have Bigfoot, but the Little People, who have REAL powerful medicine.

[505thPIR]

I spent my youth in the mountains and forests of Central and Northern British Columbia and the past 20 yrs or so on the West Coast of BC....have seen lots of bear up close along with plenty mooseand deer. Cougar, wolves, goats and sheep t a distancea nd many, many tracks(sans anyhing other than our hominid version...I have met over time some very old an fossilized trappers/prospectors who via ther own experience and networks have no belief in the creatuue...the mythology of Sasquatch has always been there but no bones, teeth,scat, coprolites ever found. Large mammals leave these things around. They don' exist beyond our collective compulsion to scare/mystify ourselves.

[Charles I]

Thank you for this diversion from the ME. It is pouring rain here so a day of Mountain Monsters and Trollhunter is just the ticket seeing as how Oblivion turned out to be a worse movie than Cruise is actor, and after Prometheus and Total Recall, need a scifi break.

Please do not shoot the Grassman, by name alone we must be related. Further, Pat, to whose expertise I defer, upon viewing a scenic photo accidentally composed so as to capture a foot in the foreground, responded with a singular inquiry as to the Sasquatchian nature of my admittedly hairy - and smoky - scene.

To which I replied: "I am the Sasquatch" forwarding much hairier and smokier evidence of my claim.

Sadly, if they share my genes my hairy ilk is not immune from the challenges of age, gravity and circumference.

It'll be an easy hunt.

Happy shooting.